September 29. Dad was visited by his nurses and respiratory therapists before 8:00 A.M. so that he’d be ready to leave by 8:30 A.M. to have the PICC line removed and the dialysis catheter changed. The ambulance arrived a little early and he was transferred to Interventional Radiology (IR) at S&W Memorial at 8:20 A.M.
Shortly after Dad arrived at the IR department, he tried to scoot himself off the end of the bed. When confronted by the OR nurse, Dad became combative and took a swing at him. In my whole life, I had never seen my father take a swing at anything bigger than a tree roach, yet it seemed to be a common occurrence during his hospitalization. He must have been impossibly frustrated, and I’m sure the cocktails of meds didn’t help his view of the world. As often happened at the CCH, Dad wanted to get up and use the bathroom, which was a physical impossibility. As the OR nurse and an aide helped him with the bedpan, Dad got a skin tear on his calf. During his 147 days of hospitalization, his skin had become very fragile and these skin tears were an all-too-common and disturbing occurrence. Dad finally settled down and his procedure was performed by Dr. Bradley Dollar without further incident. Dad was ready to return to the CCH by 11:00 A.M.
While Dad was having his plumbing changed out, I stayed at home so that I could meet our assistant from One On One and take care of a few things at WalMart with Stan. Among other things, we needed to stock up on washcloths, towels, and sheets. While we were at WalMart, I saw Sheila Rogers from Interim Hospice. After I had called her a couple of days ago about our change of plans from hospice to home care, she resumed her plans to move and was now picking up a few necessities for her new place. She was very gracious and supportive about the turn of events. I really liked Sheila. She was one of those people who seemed to exude compassion and kindness through her pores.
When Gale arrived, I showed her around the house and told her about our plans to have her stay in the back bedroom. Mom would sleep in the twin bed in the master bedroom, and I would stay in the guest room upstairs. Stan had purchased a baby monitor and we had placed the main station in the master bedroom and one monitor station in my bedroom and the other in Gale’s room. Gale immediately disagreed with the plan and said that her room was too far from the master bedroom to be able to attend to Dad at night. Instead, she suggested that she stay in the master bedroom with Dad and that Mom should stay in the back bedroom. It was a good call. We still kept the back bedroom as her home base, where she could keep her personal effects and use the shower. We set up an inflatable bed for Mom in a large room that was adjacent to the guest room. This wasn’t Gale’s first rodeo and she offered many good suggestions.
After getting Gale settled in, she and I headed to the CCH and arrived shortly before Dad returned from his procedure at Memorial. When he returned, I introduced Gale to Dad.

Maybe it was the 100+ questions that I asked her, but I think that Angela sensed that I was still a little unsure about changing out the trach. I was less confident than a baby Wallenda who was preparing to move from the safety of a net to a high-wire act across the Grand Canyon. She said that we could change the trach now. Although it could be a problem if you waited too long to change it, changing it more frequently than seven days was not a problem. Angela assured me that it usually took three trach changes to become comfortable with the process. This would be my third time. I had a camera with me and had Gale record the entire process starting with wrestling with the gloves through cleaning and repacking the trach. This time I had sufficient disk space. I was also glad that Gale was here to witness the trach-changing process.
Angela also showed us how to use and maintain the suction machine that we’d have at home. It was a loud contraption—much louder than the system at the hospital, and I hated it. She also gave me a care package of sorts that contained supplies to help us get started, including a couple of trach care kits.
While we were bonding with the suction machine, we noticed that Dad’s new dialysis dressing was seeping a lot of blood. The nurses tried applying pressure dressings to stop the bleeding but to no avail. The nurses eventually called on Dr. Anderson. To stem the bleeding, he had to cauterize the wound.
During the hubbub of activity around Dad, Marty stopped by and I stepped out of Dad’s room to talk with her. When I asked her about Dad’s prescriptions, she said that we were responsible for filling them and asked if I wanted her to fax them to our pharmacy. At the glacial rate at which things were progressing, I didn’t think that I’d have time to get to the pharmacy before they closed. I gladly accepted her offer to transmit the prescriptions.
Whenever the room was empty of CCH providers, Gale gleefully slipped into scavenger mode, gathering anything that wasn’t furniture or nailed down. It made perfect sense because most of the supplies would be tossed after Dad’s discharge. The collection of goodies probably didn’t require covert activities; Angela had provided us with everything we requested, and more. Fortunately, we had come armed with several empty bags.
I called the house and Mom and Stan were still waiting for the morning delivery of the hospital bed, respiratory equipment, and medical supplies. It was now after 3:30 P.M. and I was becoming concerned that Dad would be discharged and arrive home before his bed.
Marty had faxed Dad’s prescriptions to a Scott & White pharmacy near my parent’s house. Unlike CVS and Walgreens pharmacies, the Scott & White pharmacies were not open late, and I had to make sure that I picked up Dad’s prescriptions before they closed. At 4:30 P.M., I left Gale with Dad and went to the pharmacy. Dad’s prescriptions were ready, but I was a little unprepared for the $239.22 sticker shock. The culprit turned out to be Renvela, which retailed for $1250 for 45 packets. Before I could leave, the pharmacist wanted to meet with me to discuss the bag full of prescriptions that included meds to raise blood pressure, an antifungal, a statin, nausea, pain medicine, meds for delirium and sleep, and Renvela, the phosphorous binder. I’d have to make a spreadsheet to keep track of his meds, dosages, and times.
I returned home from the pharmacy just after 5:00 P.M. and the guys from American HomePatient had arrived a few minutes earlier and were transforming the master bedroom into our hospital room. Because transportation services are a low priority for ambulances, Dad and Gale had had to wait more than an hour for the ambulance ride home from the CCH. The wait time enabled us to sorta prepare the room. In addition to our special flooring and the shelving, we had also spent a pretty penny on everything that Medicare didn’t cover, like blood pressure equipment and an oximeter, bed pads, and all those linens. Just to set up the room cost us close to $700. We were lucky that we could afford it.
Dad and Gale arrived, via ambulance, at 7:15 P.M. Dad was glad to be home, but he seemed a little anxious. He hadn’t been home for several months, and his memories of home were jumbled.
Timothy and Jared from American HomePatient were still here and they showed Gale and me how to use all of the equipment. Jared demonstrated how to set up the oxygen and the nebulizer that injected moisture into the oxygen tube. Because Dad wasn’t breathing through his nose, he needed the added moisture to keep his air supply moist. Timothy then showed us how to set up the Kangaroo enteral feeding pump and tube feed. My head was spinning and I hoped that between the two of us, we could remember how to use everything.
After Jared and Timothy left, Gale and I studied all of the containers of meds, trying to determine what to give Dad tonight. Right off the bat, I pulled out the Haldol, Hycet, and Risperidone, and put them in another room. It probably wasn’t a good idea, but on my watch, he was going cold turkey and would never receive these drugs again. As it was, I still gave him five different drugs through his PEG tube. Gale unpacked the tube feed bags and set up his tube feed.
Because Dad didn’t get home until after 5:00 P.M., he had to be admitted by the S&W Home Health night nurse. Leo finally arrived at 10:00 P.M., and Mom went to bed after she led him to the bedroom. He was a trip, and Gale and I were pretty sure he had had a couple of cups of coffee. According to him, he was the expert because of the two letters after his name. The admitting process seemed to take forever and included an inspection of the house and a check of Dad’s vitals. Leo finally left shortly after midnight.
Gale and I prayed that Dad would stay in bed. Unlike the hospital beds, this one did not have rails at the foot of the bed. Fortunately, he slept all night—that is, if you call sleeping until 4:00 AM. all night.



Moments after arriving home, Rachel called me. She said that she had just heard about our change in plans—most likely outside of Dad’s room. She said that the
I emailed Becky Crabtree at 
After Jennifer left the room, Dad asked me about “all of the buildings that he was going to travel through.” I explained to him that to get home, he wouldn’t travel through buildings, but that his ambulance would take him home via the Loop and 31st Street. I drew him a bad, oversimplified map of the area and explained where everything was and the distances between them. He had been hospitalized so long that he was confused, thinking that there was a difference between our house and our home. He then told me that it would be prudent to get him a bedpan, so I called the nurse and left his room.
At 11:00 A.M., Angela returned, and my respiratory therapy training ratcheted up a notch. In addition to suctioning Dad today, she said that I would
While I was sitting with Dad, Angela returned to the room with printed instructions about how to suction and change out a trach. Dad was sleeping, so I decided to read the entire document. I write technical documentation for a living, and although I’m not diligent about always reading it, this seemed like a good time to read the manual. I was glad that I did. When Angela stopped by again, I told her that the two other respiratory therapists had had me insert the tubing much further into Dad’s trach than the instructions advised. She told me that she had noticed that I had performed deep suctioning on Dad, but that it wasn’t necessary. When I changed my suctioning technique, I found that suctioning didn’t hurt Dad the way it did with some of the respiratory therapists. I was glad that Angela was now my trainer. I recalled how Dad had told her that she was different from the other respiratory therapists and how he didn’t like others, like Victor. Angela had me suction Dad the rest of the day, and by the end of the day, I was somewhat comfortable with the procedure, although I still had to psych myself up for it.
If you spend any time at a hospital, you quickly learn that healthcare is a dirty business and the floor is difficult to keep clean. My parents’ house, including their bedroom, was carpeted with a beautiful sea green carpet. We were pretty certain that the carpeting would not survive Dad’s home care. One of Stan’s assignments was to figure out how to save the carpet. He eventually decided on chair mats. He bought out the supply of rectangular mats at Staples and Office Max and then worked out the arrangement of the mats in the bedroom. In addition to protecting the floor, the mats provided a relatively hard surface and protected the carpet from some of the heavy equipment and the wheelchair that would be brought into the room. He also purchased some shelving and boxes that we would need for storing medical supplies. Thank goodness my parents’ bedroom was large enough to accommodate everything.
Shortly after we arrived, I went to the nurses’ station to see Jennifer. She said that she had been waiting for me to arrive so that I could administer Dad’s morning meds. At practically the same time, Dr. Smith arrived and we discussed Dad’s feeding tube and his invasive lines. I agreed with the doctor that because of its upkeep and the potential for infection, we wanted the
I returned to the hospital at 2:00 P.M. to find that Jennifer and the aide were giving Dad a bath. When they were finished, Jennifer and I maneuvered Dad into the wheelchair. Jennifer thought that he was a bit weaker than yesterday and said that she wanted him back in bed in about an hour. It was a nice day, so after I had Dad cough up some secretions, we headed outside in the wheelchair. We strolled on all of the available sidewalks, which still wasn’t much of an outing, and then settled under the covered hospital entrance. While we were sitting out front, Stan and Mom drove up and visited. Stan could stay for only a couple of minutes because they had been grocery shopping and he had to get the perishables home. Mom and I visited outside with Dad until 3:25 P.M. Shortly after the three of us returned to Dad’s room, Jennifer, Hector, and I put him back in bed. Mom and I visited with Dad until about 4:30 P.M.
Stan and I stayed up late to watch the total lunar eclipse (blood moon). While watching the moon, my dear friend Rhoda texted me to see how I was doing. I quickly called her to let her know about the miracle and our change in plans.
We met with the representative from Scott & White and although she seemed very professional and they would provide a good service, we were sick and tired of this organization and wanted to cut our ties with them. I confess that I entered the interview with a somewhat closed mind and I didn’t note the name of the person whom we interviewed. I wish that I had because I owe her a debt of thanks. Knowing that we would need some very expensive assistance, she gave us the name of a company that provided 24×7 care. The company was
Before she left the CCH yesterday, Mom left her cell phone with Dad so that he could call her if necessary. He called her early in the morning to see if she was awake. He then called her later in the morning to tell her that someone had broken his electric shaver. He could be a pill with a phone.
When I arrived, I met Dr. Ciceri and he explained to me that Dad had something that sounded like “the Canada fungus.” He said that they planned to replace his dialysis catheter and his PIC line. The doctor had also started Dad on an antifungal. He said that he requested a TTE (transthoracic echocardiogram) for later today. I didn’t understand the significance of most of what he said, but I clearly understood what he said next. He said that Dad’s prognosis was extremely poor, that he probably had one to two months to live, and would most likely die in a nursing home.
At 9:40 P.M., I was awakened by the house phone, and I ran to answer it before it woke Mom. As far as we were concerned, there was nothing worse than a nighttime phone call. My parents’ phone system had an audio caller ID. My heart practically stopped when I heard it announce that the call was from Scott & White. The call was from Jeliza, Dad’s nurse. According to her, Dad insisted that he wanted to go home and that he had seen Mom in the hall. He kept calling out for her, and the nurse couldn’t calm him. She hoped that my mother or I might be more successful. Jeliza held up the phone to Dad’s ear while I explained to him that we had been in his room until 6:00 P.M., but that he had been asleep. He asked me when we would return to see him again, and when I said, “tomorrow,” he asked if we’d come by early. When I told him that we’d see him after dialysis, he said that he wasn’t going to dialysis anymore and that he would go someplace else. I explained that going someplace else would require advance planning and that we couldn’t make alternative plans on a Sunday night. I promised him that Mom and I would be there and that I’d visit with him before I left for Houston. He agreed to that plan and we said good night. The nurse took back the phone and thanked me for talking with him.
September 12. Mom and I arrived at the CCH at 8:00 A.M. Dad was still restrained and his call button was on the floor. John, Dad’s nurse, told us that his heart rate had been elevated to 135 and he became
Mom had been encouraged 
With the exception of a couple of golf tournaments, Dad hadn’t been watching any television since May 6. To catch him up on the latest political happenings, Mom brought him the Newsweek magazine that had Donald Trump’s picture on the cover. At the time, Mr. Trump still didn’t seem like he’d make it to the general election, let alone the White House.
Today was dialysis day, so Mom and I spent the morning at home doing chores and picked 284 tomatoes from the vegetable garden. We had picked so many tomatoes this summer that Mom and I were eating tomato sandwiches every day—sometimes twice a day. We arrived at the CCH at 12:30 P.M. and encountered
August 23. Sundays at the CCH were pretty uneventful. There was no dialysis or therapies and you didn’t see the doctors after the morning rounds unless there was a problem. You’d think that the parking lot would be full of cars, but the CCH wasn’t teeming with visitors. The place seemed empty, dark, and depressing. The doctors at Memorial had told me on more than one occasion that a primary reason for transferring Dad from the ICU to the CCH was so that he could be exposed to more light. These rooms had small windows and even with all the light on, the rooms still seemed dark.
Dr. Stewart then told me and Mom that he wanted to meet with us in a conference room to consult with us about some of Dad’s future possibilities. He started off this consultation by stating that they considered Dad’s recovery to be one of their best achievements and acknowledged our part in that success. He went on to say that he suspected that if Dad did go home, he could have more episodes of pneumonia. He continued by saying that Dad might never fully develop the ability to swallow, and if he did, he could very likely choke on his food and develop pneumonia again. He went on to say that although Dad might never be able to eat peas and carrots, we should let him eat what he wants, regardless of the consequences. He said that there was a good chance that Dad would go home with a trach tube. After that disheartening meeting with one of our favorite caregivers, Mom and I returned to Dad’s room.

